Category Archives: Funny

Powerball Considers Raising Odds

There have been so many winners that Powerball officials are considering raising the odds and effectively making it harder to win. If the current winning pace continues for the rest of the year, they stand to lose around $400 million. So why would making the Powerball harder to win draw more people to purchase tickets? “Frequent” winners result in relatively small jackpots. Raising the odds would make it harder to win and should, theoretically, result in bigger jackpots. And, I guess, big jackpots attract those people that don’t want to waste their money on the small money jackpots. Why spend $2 (or whatever it costs) to try and win $50 million when you can spend the same $2 and try and win $300 million. Granted, someone has to win eventually, but with the odds already at 1 in 120 million, you are much more likely to get struck by lightning (1 in 2.3 million) or writing a New York Times best seller (1 in 220) than win the lottery.

The Odds
Powerball jackpot winners on a streak
Powerball: Too Many Winners?

Weird News: Ski jumpers leap into trees

CANOE — CNEWS – Weird News: Ski jumpers leap into trees

Last year’s champion, Eldar Heide, won gold with a jump that included a graceful landing about two metres up the trunk of a small birch.

“Tree-Ski-Jumping” is the latest thing in Norway. Check out a picture here: http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/050304/483/osl10603041724

Mullah Nasruddin

Slashdot | Good Joke

One day the Mullah went into an inn as he felt a little hungry. However, he found at once the food there was too expensive for him. He was just about to leave when the innkeeper came up to him.
“Do you think you can leave without paying?” said the innkeeper.
“Why should I pay since I haven’t eaten anything here?” asked Nasruddin.
“Then why did you come in?”
“I found your food smelt good,but it was too expensive for me!”
“Well, now that you’ve enjoyed smelling my food, it is the same as enjoying the food itself, so you have to pay.”
“The mullah frowned at the innkeeper’s words, then smiled and took out his purse, jingling the coins in it:
“Do you hear the sound of my money?”
“Yes,I do.” the innkeeper said in excitement.
“Then we have concluded business!” cried Nasruddin, “That sound is the same as enjoying the money itself!”

Monk Super Glues Eyes Shut

February 22, 2005
Bangkok: An elderly Thai monk accidentally glued his eye shut when he mistook a tube of super glue for eyedrops, media reports said yesterday.

Monk Prapatworakhun, 81, who is now undergoing treatment at Angthong Hospital, 110km from the capital, said he accidently took the super glue from his temple’s drug cabinet while looking for eye drops to relieve a severe eye itch last Thursday.

“I squeezed out several drops on the floor and saw a clear liquid, so I put four drops into each eye,” Prapatworakhun told The Nation newspaper from his hospital bed.
Click here

“In about a minute, my eyes felt cold and then sealed closed,” said the monk.

Eye specialists at the hospital said the monk was undergoing treatment to remove the glue from his eyes, adding they would have to wait until he could reopen them before they could determine the extent of damage.

February 23, 2005
Bangkok: Thai doctors have restored the sight of an elderly Buddhist monk who accidentally glued his eyes shut when he mistook a tube of super glue for eyedrops.

Doctors at Angthong Hospital restored sight in the right eye of 81-year-old monk, Prapatworakhun.
Click here

Doctor Banjob Nimitpornsukho said they had used an acetone solvent. A similar operation would be performed on the left eye. – Sapa-DPA

This is funny, but I’m glad to see that his vision was restored.

Oops: Blue Screen Of Death Interrupts Gates’ CES Show

By TechWeb News

Bill Gates’ keynote presentation Wednesday night at the Consumer Electronics Show didn’t quite go according to plan: glitches, including a dreaded “Blue Screen of Death,” interrupted the show several times.

Microsoft’s chairman, who shared the stage with late-night talk show host Conan O’Brien, kept his cool when Microsoft Media Center crashed during the presentation, and an Xbox displayed the blue screen of death.

As the Xbox went down for the count, the Microsoft executive running that part of the presentation, Garrett Young, said, “This is a little bit of demo karma, sorry, I’m out of system memory apparently. Yeah, so just imagine, if you will, that I was customizing my car and doing some really cool stuff.”

O’Brien played to the crowd during the crashes with lines like “right now nine people are being fired,” and “Who’s in charge of Microsoft? Oh.”

Get ready for more Moore

Yahoo! News – Get ready for more Moore

Michael Moore met with Harvey Weinstein and Moore says they plan to start working — now — on “Fahrenheit 9/11½.”

“We want to get cameras rolling now and have it ready in two-three years,” Moore says. “We want to document and commercialize it. Fifty-one percent of the American people lacked information (in this election) and we want to educate and enlighten them. They weren’t told the truth. We’re communicators and it’s up to us to start doing it now.

Moore is such a tool. I still am baffled by how he was given a prominent seat at the Democratic National Convention. Why would anyone want to be associated with that guy?

Free degree with no studying?!? — What a joke!

Today I found a spam email entitled, Degree in days clap, this is the body of the article:

WHAT A GREAT IDEA!
We provide a concept that will allow anyone with sufficient life experience to obtain a fully verifiable university diploma.
Bachelor, Master or even a Doctorate.
Think of it, within a month you too could be a college graduate.
Many people share the same frustration, they are all doing the work of the person that has the degree, and the person that has the degree is getting all the money.
Don’t you think that it is time you were paid fair compensation for the level of work you are already doing?
This is your chance to finally make the right move and receive your due benefits.
If you are like most people, you are more than qualified with your experience, but you are lacking that prestigious piece of paper known as a diploma that is often the passport to success.
Go Here TODAY, to fill out an online application form AND GIVE YOUR LIFE A CHANCE!

First off, what a stupid subject. Is that a name of a song that they have on their site?? Anyway, I went to their site http://www.investmentinfuture.info/ (not a direct link because I don’t want to up their PageRank 😉 ). Turns out it is a site where you can pay for a degree from a non-accredited university or college. (That’s the keyword that they fail to highlight). They advertise these benefits: No books, no course, no tests, no studying!! What do you have to do then??? The idea, I guess, is that you pay money for “a beautiful Diploma, [an excellent transcript], and a [phenomenal cover letter]” (a testimonial on their site). Then, you can use this diploma to go out and get a higher paying job.

Looking for a job tomorrow? No problem, just order the “Degree certificate by express courier.” What a joke. They give diplomas “based on your current knowledge and life experience. If you’re too busy to sit in a classroom, the fast track provides a Bachelor’s, Master’s or Doctorate that displays to all what you really can do!”

Basically, you get a pretty looking piece of paper that has the name of some bogus no-name non-accredited university that you can show at job interviews. While it might look nice and make you feel important when hanging in your office, what good is it going to do when companies actually do a background check and find that working the fry machine at McDonald’s gave you the life experience for a Master’s?

BTW, according to this site: Accredited vs. Nonaccredited Colleges from collegeview.com:

Nonaccredited means that the institution will probably give you an occupational degree. [Accredited] means the college is an approved institution of higher education, and you will earn a bachelor’s or an associate’s degree. You should search for an accredited college because if you ever transfer, then the credits will go from college to college.

Googol may sue Google

Source; Another (longer) source (w/ interview)

The family of Professor Edward Kasner, the man who came up with the word “googol,” a term used to describe 10 raised to the 100th power, in a 1940 book, is thinking of suing Google if not given the opportunity to have insider access to Google’s IPO. “His relatives claim that he is spinning is his grave.” “She said that although Google has bought attention to the name, it has not bought attention to KasnerÂ’s work. Google was not using the concepts, but just capitalising on the name.”

From Slashdot post:
“Why can you even sue over this? If it’s a mathmatical [sic] concept it should be public domain. It’s the equivilent [sic] of suing someone over using the word dozen. You can’t trademark a quantity can you??”

I personally think that Google’s acknowledgement of the history behind the word “googol” is enough. Googol isn’t even trademarked. And, as the link with the interview says, there is really no legal case that Edward Kasner’s family can bring against Google. They are just hoping to cash in on the hard work of others…

Someone on Slashdot mentioned that a similar court case would be for Parker Brothers to sue Microsoft over the word “Monopoly.”

Google’s IPO Should have multipled by pi instead…

The amount of the $2.7bn [IPO] offering contains an inside joke for the math-minded. The exact offering, $2,718,281,828, is the product of “e” and $1bn, where “e” is the base of the natural logarithm — a logarithm especially useful in calculus — and equals 2.718281828….
Source

Google really should have multipled by pi instead. 😉 Quote: Ryan Liegel

Google is awesome. My only concern over their IPO is that they will keep functioning the way they are now. When they go public, will they be allowed to make last second press releases as they did with Gmail? I sure hope so…

This article, Google does things differently has some interesting points. Larry Page (one of the founders of Google) says that “Google is not a conventional company…Don’t be evil…[The company’s aim is to] do things that matter [and do] good things [for people, even at the expense of short-term profit.]

I hope this type of attitude continues.